Resistance Is Futile! by David Boyne contains eccentric quietly hilarious and deceptively meaningful essays on being Alive and Doing Stuff. Kind of like essays by David Sedaris or Mark Twain or Dave Barry. Except totally different.
Kindle Books by David Boyne
Happy Accidents
Resistance Is Futile!
Travels in My 3 Pound Universe
Velocity Stories
X Marks the Spot
Buy a Kindle Now! (Or just check them out.)
HAPPY ACCIDENTS "These essays brim with profound insight. They are tales of ordinary life, extraordinarily observed. And they're funny. So funny you hardly know he's making you think 'til you catch yourself doing it." --Patty Kadel, Cartoonist "These stories take you on a sardonic ride as curvy as it is bodacious. Sardonic, curvy, bodacious. Yeah, that's what I said." --Julie Ann Weinstein, author of Flashes From the Other World "These beautifully crafted, poignant, and humorous essays by David Boyne capture the magic in daily life, if we stop and pay attention. He reminds us that happiness, indeed, is not an accident." -- Paula Margulies, author of Coyote Heart "These essays are poignant, funny and intellectually charged." — Traci Foust, author of Nowhere Near Normal, A Memoir of OCD Buy the Happy Accidents Kindle book |
||||
X MARKS THE SPOT: We're All Going to Die! So… What's for Lunch? by David Boyne 13 More Offbeat Essays Boldly Exploring the Irony of the Ordinary Hilarious, deceptively meaningful essays of ordinary, everyday events, in which the author sets out to prove his startling, radical, highly controversial assertion that we are all going to die. In these fast and furiously funny essays we ride shotgun as David Boyne arrives in a new city and is given a map by a mysterious stranger (X MARKS THE SPOT), or reads his email (GRUDGE HOLDING LETTER BOMBING SHIT LISTERS), or strains to curb his inherited gene of East Coast sarcasm as he mixes it up with goofy new-age Californians (IT’S ALL GOOD, ADVENTURES IN THE LAND OF THE LOTUS EATERS). We breeze down a wacky detour back to high school (WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE!) but then take a wrong turn and find ourselves lost in the woods (JUST PASSING THROUGH) and wind up parsing the meaning of a Japanese obituary (EITHER AND OR). And after this wild, bumpy, exhilarating, ironic odyssey through the ordinary, we will look up and find -- that we are right back where we started. The world around us is exactly the same as when we left it. But we’re not. Buy the X Marks the Spot Kindle book |
||||
TRAVELS IN MY 3 POUND UNIVERSE : 12 Essays Proving That All Roads Lead to Where We're Going by David Boyne From a Review by Ann Bancroft
It happened to me. It could happen to you. Buy the Travels In My Three Pound Universe Kindle book |
||||
VELOCITY: Odd Stories of People in Motion (fiction) The lively and decidely offbeat stories in this collection of fiction include darkly hilarious lampoons, such as NEWTON’S COMEUPPANCE, the author’s entry into the venerable shaggy dog genre, in which, thanks to a 90-pound beach combing golden retriever who discovers secret anti-gravity technology—the entire world is transformed—for better AND for worse. Or THE CONFESSION BOOTH, in which a lean and hungry and horny young lawyer discovers sexual release—and insightful career counseling—behind the Green Door inside the Pink Pussycat Theatre. Other stories are quietly unsettling, with common elements, that may or may not be connected, with a flow of events that leave us at the end, like the characters, with new unanswered questions. There is the history professor who takes a book from the body of a dead homeless man in THE IMMIGRANT, and the 11-year-old boy at the center of IN THE NAME OF THE FATHER, who steals a book from the library. Other stories, such as THE SURVIVOR and OUT IN THE COLD, show a middle-aged woman and a teen-age boy responding to the overwhelming power of accident, and of anger. Then there are stories of small-scale ridiculousness, with the “roommate from Hell” story, THE DAWN OF JOY. And large-scale ridiculousness, such as BUMS: A NEW YORK CHRISTMAS STORY that, believe it or not, takes place in August, inside the Third Street Mens Shelter, opening with a food fight that escalates into a city-wide riot. |
||||
BackTalk db |David Boyne's Blog: I Could Be Wrong, But... | David Boyne's paperback book, I Could Be Wrong, But... | Complaint Department
| Like Wow Totally FREE Essays! | Velocity Stories | Happy Accidents | X Marks the Spot | Travels in My 3 Pound Universe | Resistance Is Futile! | You Must Be Present to Win | Share
| Follow @DavidBoyne
Resistance Is Futile!Offbeat Essays On What to Do When the Shift Hits the Fanby David Boyne(Please note that no trees were harmed or mistreated in the production of these Kindle ebooks. All electrons employed were over 18-billion-years old and freely consenting. Any resemblance between the characters in these stories and actual people is entirely intentional.) Buy a Kindle Now! (Or just check them out.) Tweet Resistance Is Futile!This is the fourth book in the Kindle series, I COULD BE WRONG, BUT... COLLECTED ESSAYS OF DAVID BOYNE. Other Kindle books in the series include, HAPPY ACCIDENTS, TRAVELS IN MY THREE POUND UNIVERSE, and X MARKS THE SPOT. Book Description Quietly hilarious and deceptively meaningful essays of ordinary events. The slapstick repartee of HOW WOULD BUDDHA DRIVE? ponders the question, How can one meditate blissfully, then drive recklessly? In the memoir piece, IF I HAD A HAMMER, we ride along with an intense, erratic college student as he pilots a motorcycle through a snowstorm in Maine, on his way to make a life-changing purchase. And before we know it, we have passed with him through Manhattan's Alphabet City and East Village, San Francisco's Nob Hill, and come to a stop a dozen years later somewhere on a porch in Oregon. In the essay, OWNING UP, we buy a house. Or do we? Carried along on by a fast montage of reflections on the false-reality of owning stuff, we somehow wind up, of all places, inside the movie, Midnight Cowboy. And there we quite possibly learn what we each truly do own. In the quiet story, BREAKFAST WITH ANNIE, sharing a meal with an 80-year-old neighbor leads us into bearing witness to the long arc of an anonymous life nearing its lonely end. And in the deliberately misleading set piece, KILROY WAS HERE, we start off with a not-too-bright kid growing up in Connecticut but thinking he's being raised by a cult of Zen masters. Yet, by the end of the journey, we wonder if that not-too-bright kid may have had it right, after all. But by then we're having stale cheese and cheap read wine at a literary event, and the essay, IN MY OPINION, somehow manages to tie all together in a neat little bundle, being a writer, receiving angry emails, drinking organic coffee, and learning how to use an AK-47 assault rifle. Talk about mood swings! Yet. In these and the other essays of this collection, there is something going on or coming across. A theme, or a running joke, or an encrypted message. There is an unmistakable flowing undercurrent to these sometimes funny, sometimes sad, sometimes hilarious, sometimes sarcastic and teasing essays, even if it is never put directly into words. But what is it? Whoa! Hold on thar, Baba Looey! What's the title of this here book again? Buy a Kindle Now! (Or just check them out.) Click this link to BackTalk db!
Click this link to BackTalk db! |
